April 12, 2002 8:00 AM PDT
When games stop being fun
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Bennett, whose family life and grades in school have recovered nicely since he stopped playing the game about a year ago, considers himself a recovered "EverQuest" addict, now able to control his desire to immerse himself in the game's rich fantasy world.
"The game almost ruined my life," said the network engineer in southern Indiana. "It was my life. I ceased being me; I became Madrid, the Great Shaman of the North. Thinking of it now, I almost cringe; it's so sad."
Long a subject of half-serious jokes among devotees of computer and video games, game addiction is receiving serious attention lately as fantasy games such as "EverQuest"--nicknamed "EverCrack" by many players--proliferate.
A Wisconsin woman has blamed "EverQuest" in the suicide late last month of her 21-year-old son, who had a history of mental health problems and was an obsessive "EverQuest" player. The game was also implicated in the death last year of a Tampa, Fla., infant, whose father allegedly was so devoted to the game he fatally neglected the child.
While such cases are rare, mental-health professionals say the fantasy worlds offered by computer and video games can become the stuff of very real addictions that destroy marriages and careers.
"It's a huge and growing problem with older teenage males and young adult males," said Dr. Timothy Miller, a Stockton, Calif., clinical psychologist. "I've seen a number of cases with 17- or 18-year-old males where they have a broadband (Internet) connection and they basically haven't left the house for years.
"I had one young man who was trying to get on Social Security disability for agoraphobia," he said. "He didn't have a mental disorder; he just didn't want to leave 'EverQuest' or instant messaging."
Some have suggested that warning labels be placed on "EverQuest," which has more than 400,000 paying subscribers. Scott McDaniel, vice president of marketing for "EverQuest" publisher Sony Online Entertainment, said the company relies on players to employ good judgment.
"I guess our standpoint is the same as all kinds of products--you have to be responsible in using it," he said. "You don't see disclaimers when you get in a car saying 'Don't run over people.' People have to exhibit their own good sense, and if they have kids, they need to pay attention to what they're doing."
Video games played on consoles such as Sony's PlayStation 2 can become the object of compulsive behavior, especially among children. But such problems are usually easily solved through modest parental intervention and the self-limiting nature of such games, which become repetitive and boring at some point.
The lure of "heroinware"
Online PC games such "EverQuest," the new "Dark Age of Camelot," or "Diablo II"--dubbed "heroinware" by some players--can pose much more complex problems. Extensive chat features give such games a social aspect missing from offline activities, and the collaborative/competitive nature of working with or against other players can make it hard to take a break.
• Neglect of family and friends
• Lying to employers and family about activities
• Problems with school or job
• Carpal tunnel syndrome
• Dry eyes
• Failure to attend to personal hygiene
• Sleep disturbances or changes in sleep patterns
Miller cites two defining characteristics of addiction: The person regularly engages in activity for much longer than originally planned and "(continues) doing it in spite of adverse consequences."
By those standards, most of the players described in online support groups such as Yahoo's "EverQuest Widows" qualify as addicts.
"I have a friend who's in the process of getting a divorce because of 'EverQuest,'" said Lea, a regular player of the game. "A guy I talk to has been through three girlfriends and even more jobs because of the game." Like other players, Lea declined to provide a last name.
Although Lea said she's been able to find a workable balance between "EverQuest" and real-world obligations, she often questions her devotion to the game.
"I think of quitting all the time," she said. "I'm sure there are a lot of departments I'm lacking in now, like I don't pay as much attention to my kids as I should."
Most online games include copious amounts of chats, allowing players to interact with each other in the guise of the characters they represent.
Dr. Maressa Hecht Orzack, director of Computer Addiction Services at Harvard University-affiliated McLean Hospital, said the social aspect is a primary factor in many game addictions.
"Many of these people are lonely, have never felt like they belonged," she said. "People get a sense of belonging in the game. In some cases, it provides the only friends they interact with."
Such games also lure players with complex systems of goals and achievements. "EverQuest" players engage in activities to develop their characters from one level to the next and compete to find valuable in-game elements such as armor and weapons. Players can find themselves wrapped up in the game for hours as they struggle to gain one more skill or weapon.
"I'd say the most addictive part for me was definitely the gain of power and status," said Bennett. "The way in which as you progressively gain power you become more (of) an object of awe (to) the other players...each new skill isn't enough."
Miller, the Stockton psychologist, saw just how compelling such in-game goals can be when he tried playing "Diablo II," to see what the game was about. Before long, he found himself in all-night sessions with the game, a habit he broke by deleting the game from his PC and giving away the CD it came on.
Such lures can be insidious, Miller said. "Here I was in a good position to understand the problem...and yet I really did have to struggle to beat this thing," Miller said of his game habit. "I can imagine that somebody with less knowledge of these kinds of issues would really have a hard time understanding what was happening to them."
Acknowledging the problem
Angie said her live-in boyfriend spends at least 30 hours a week playing "EverQuest" as a female elf--a character choice she finds "weird and disturbing"--at the expense of housework, family obligations and sometimes work. "The saddest part of all is the fact that he doesn't admit that it's an addiction and seems oblivious to the damage his personal life is suffering due to the game," she said.
For players who do admit they have a problem, the most common response is a guilt-and-purge cycle common to many addictions. While Bennett was able to kill his character and delete the "EverQuest" software with no regrets, many game addicts aren't as successful.
"The people I've seen who quit the game and destroy their character...almost all come back and play addictively again," said Lea.
For most players, true recovery involves looking at the issues underlying the game habit, Orzack said. She uses a cognitive-therapy approach in which players examine the emotional motives that prompt them to play a game excessively and look for alternate ways to satisfy those needs.
"Therapy takes the issue that there are a lot of other things going on," she said. "The goal is to get people to realize there is something going on and they need to be in charge of changing it."
Excessive game playing often reflects problems in the home environment, Orzack added.
Nicolas Yee conducted extensive player research on "EverQuest" while earning a psychology degree from Hanford College. He found a direct correlation between the amount of time hardcore players spend in the game and a tendency toward neuroticism--"basically how easily a person gets depressed or goes into mood swings," he said.
Yee said that while he doesn't doubt games like "EverQuest" can become an addiction, they can also be a productive outlet for dealing with emotional and behavioral issues.
"Environments like 'EverQuest' can help a person if they're shy or have trouble forming social relationships," he said. "They have this environment where they can safely try new things out. They can experiment with being more vocal, or they can try out a leadership role, which may not be an opportunity they have in real life. Especially for teenagers, it lets them try out different roles and identities at a time when they may be really struggling with those kinds of issues."
Fun and games or serious business?
Is your game playing a hobby or a pathological behavior pattern? Computer Addiction Services at Harvard University-affiliated McLean Hospital says psychological and physical symptoms of addiction include the following:
"Each goal leads to another goal, and there are critical choices you make along the way," he said. "You invest a lot of time and thought into developing a character. You feel like you've wasted your time unless you reach the next goal."
Like most addictions, the toughest part of recovering from game addiction is often getting the addict to acknowledge there's a problem--a task made all the more difficult by the seemingly innocuous nature of games.
"There's definitely an alienation in some fashion that's going on within the family structure or work structure," she said.
I have someone in my life that is seriously addicted to World of Warcraft. I couldn't find a place to talk about it, so create one called World of Warcraft Widows. It is at:
http://games.groups.yahoo.com/group/WOW_widow/
Please feel free to share your stories about how someone addicted to this or other games in your life, and how it is affecting your relationship. It is NOT a place to flame games, per se, but a place to vent, share stories, and offer comfort when needed.
Great article, by the way!
My name is Wes. Currently, I am a 19 year old, college freshman in Alabama. I forcibly liberated myself from my World of Warcraft 'addiction' this afternoon on May 2. I completed the process of deleting my beloved World of Warcraft, somehow. I don't know how I did it, but I went to Control Panel, Add/Remove, and removed it. After doing so, I aimlessly went onto the Google web page and searched World of Warcraft Addiction.. The results led me to this text box. My response is one of few that I have ever created on a forum. My whole point of this is to help people understand, my view, of a typical gamer and comprehend this as a useful tool in understanding what a typical gamer can become or is. This response creates a short path of my life spent gaming leading to my deletion of World of Warcraft, abruptly ending my gaming experience at the current time. Whoever reads this, parents especially, heed the warning that is presented to you in my finishing statement. If your an adult, limit the time your child plays computers. Please, for the sake of your child's overall life and health.
Now we quickly rewind.
I had a great life growing up. My parents took care of me and everything. They took me to Disney World and all those places. I used to play with all the children outside riding bikes and having fun. One day, I looked at a magazine and saw something. A tank? Hell if I know, it was amazing. What does the magazine do? The magazine excited me as I found a 'cool' computer game for sale. I loved everything about what I read and saw.
Here it goes.
My 'addiction' increased at a constant rate as I grew older. When I bought my first 'addicting' game called Settlers, my social life went down hill from there. The children I played with slowly faded away. I cloaked myself into an isolated environment warped in my timeless 'addiction'. I sat, day after day, at my wonderful computer downstairs at my house, almost unknowingly, staring at the screen with utter compassion. The computer was awesome. One of the kids that I rode bikes with came in and watched me play while he munched on food. This image seemed to stick in my head, I guess as a reminder of how I betrayed my friends in a sense. This kid also faded away, I guess. I had not a clue what I had gotten myself into until now but it wasn't good. I felt so powerful when I played the game "Settlers". I just loved how I could build units, colonize my base, and eliminate opponents. As a very young child, I played Army with those little green and yellow army men with bayonets. I wonder if this had something to do with my 'addiction' for fighting and death? Or maybe it was just my obsession for organized warfare which I loved, I guess...
The next 'addiction step stone would be "Imagination". "Imagination" was a network where you could play "Red Baron? which was a airplane fighting game and some kind of dungeons and dragons game. I frequently played the dungeons and dragons game, however, I don't remember what happened in this game, just some killing, I guess. I think I became a zombie to games at this age in my life which led me to, here I am. I truly think the moments spent as a child is the most important for the fundamentals of his social life. Do not allow your children to tread on these grounds I have because you will see the lonely, overused road it leaves with them.
Forwarding slightly... 14-15 years old?
My 'addiction' continued. There was really nothing I could do about it but play more and more, while I focused less on school. I guess I had an addicting personality growing up, and still do. The game was online and required five or more dollars an hour. I sat on the computer for more hours a day. The bill was quite high but my dad paid for it. My dad worked and my mom did commercials sometimes but usually just took care of me and my sister. Time on the computer was not restrained since no one in the family thought much of it. I remember Barbara, our maid, doing her ironing of the clothes across the room from me but I never really paid attention to her. I regret that. I should of socialized with her more.
Now we fast forward.
Middle School-I am playing video games again. The loneliness is really starting to set in with other kids. I talk to kids occasionally at school but never ask them to come over much and do stuff with me. I am a good looking guy, nonetheless, but I just didn't see any passion of socializing as much. My love was for my games. My 'addiction'. I played some of the games above as well as others, but then came the real turn point. One night I spent the night at my cousin's and discovered the game he liked to play. It was "Quake". My social life appeared to be doomed after seeing this game. This game was a first person shooter with cool graphics and you could blow people up. What a great environment for an adolescent to grow up in. I got the game, and played it nonstop online with the gaming service ?Mplayer"which was free. After playing on Mplayer quite some time the game ?Command and Conquer Red Alert? seemed to have sparked interest. I think this game was the best out of any I have played. Wow, the fun I had with this game. I won't go much into detail but I loved it.
Now we fast forward.
High School. Wow this is a great place. I am a freshman now and I am on the soccer team. I get picked on a little for being a freshman and paddled. The hottest girl at school liked me and asked me out. Never really having any female relations, I replied I don't know. She eventually moved on as, I guess, showed no interest in her. Truthfully, I did with all my little aching heart. I continued to invest my time into games and did not even open up the relation me and her could of had. Sad story, yes. My obsession for computer games only grew deeper. I discovered my true love, ?Everquest?. This game possessed things I had never experienced before. You could choose between classes and races and explore the world. This game probably took up most of high school life. I eventually got sent to military school half my senior year due to my failing grade in A.P. Chemistry. I never studied and just played computer games all day. Marion Military Institute was it's name. It wasn't all that bad, I met some really cool people. I was socially exposed a lot but this didn't really do anything for me. I don't think my social life in general was ever really that bad. But hey, that's from my point of view.
Now we fast forward.
Here I am in College sitting at a computer right now, 2 weeks left of school and I have ****** grades due to World of Warcraft and lack of studying. This is not all due to World of Warcraft, because I had never learned how to study since I didn't need to really in high school. The grades in high school weren't of high standards but they got me into a good college. Maybe if I had managed my time better from playing games none of this would of happened. Anyways, my social life in college was greatly affected by World of Warcraft. I first bought the game in December when it first came out. This day I had told my girlfriend I was going to come see her. She lives in my home town, while I was in college so it took effort to see her. Now, get this, before World of Warcraft, I had given up most of my online time for socialization and put myself together. Unfortunately, I had been playing the open beta. I was already addicted and in love with the game. I went and bought the game right when it came out and searched every store for it and finally found it. The girlfriend called,?Where are you.? I replied,?I am not coming home this weekend, I don't feel good.? Don't get me wrong, this girl was drop dead gorgeous, hottest girl I have ever dated. I wanted to play World of Warcraft instead of driving home to get some loving from my girlfriend. What was wrong with me?. How wrong is this? Eventually, my love, World of Warcraft, took the place of her. I never came home anymore as much so I could enhance my character in this 'wonderful' game. And yes, my girlfriend disappeared off my radar. However, eventually I did come home and I hooked up with her, but that was just the occasional hook up, I didn't care.
Now we end the journey.
Well, thanks for reading my input on this 'addiction' crisis. Would you describe me as a chronic gamer? I do, and you probably agree, as well as being astonished at what you have just read or perhaps, not. This obsession just went too far. In my opinion, all gamers are social outcasts in a sense. These gamers are playing games instead of utilizing this time socializing. But now the real question remains. Do you want your close friend, who plays World of Warcraft, to have any relation to this story? Could this be his path? The game. It takes over. Trust me. Believe me. My life goes on, and hopefully your friend will guide his life back without World of Warcraft. The information I write here serves for a sole purpose. To allow a non-gamer to step into a gamer's shoes and maybe link some pieces together to find out what your friend's problem is. ?It takes one to know one?. World of Warcraft, it takes over. This leads me to leaving, and best of luck to you all whoever reads this.
P.S. Get your Friend to stop playing that game. ASAP
immediate advice: Delete it without him knowing, break WoW cd's, you know the drill. Whatever it takes.
However a person may come upon said happiness is up to him/her. This has nothing to do with being socially acceptable or not. I don't see why the article is shifting the emphasis on [Gaming Addiction] from Addiction and placing it almost squarely on Gaming.
We assume (going with the emphasis in the article) that devoting time to an activity on the computer is wrong, and that we should quit doing it to devote time to other activities not done on the computer.
That said, we have also assumed that smoking is good for your health, cocaine should be used to cure health problems, beating kids is good for them, etc.
The difference is these can be proven wrong, while your specific [Social Priorities] cannot.
Where are the gaming success stories? The ones in which Joe can't get a date in real life, but found a mate online? The ones in which Joe is contemplating suicide but found new reasons to live in gaming? The ones in which Joe is slowly aging away, employed and used in an office cubicle all his life doing work meaningless menial tasks while some capitalist is busy making money off his efforts, about to burst out Office Space style, but with an Uzi and a deathwish -- only to have his frustration diverted into a digital format.
I have been through many multiplayer games -- quit each one as easily as any other to accommodate vacation and school schedules. The problem here does not lie in the games, people.
This stupid kid has no one to blame but himself. I love his use of "World of Warcraft did this to me" mumbo jumbo.
No, take the blame, you did it to yourself.
Thousands of gamers out there are fully capable of gaming and carrying on a normal, healthy life. I am one of those people.
WoW does not make you pay the monthly fee, WoW does not make you turn on your PC, click that icon, type in your password and start playing.
I play World of Warcraft and Battlefield 2, I work a very good full time job, I have a family and I am able to balance all of this with no problems what so ever. It is called self control, something kids like you don't seem to have these days. Stop blaming everyone else, stop blaming the game. It's people like you that get society into a panic and social initiatives manage to get games like this regulated. Games that people like myself play for fun and relaxation and are able to step away from and live a normal life in conjunction with our hobby.
My word of advise, grow up, take responsibility for your plight and stop blaming the game for your problems.
Your only problem is you. Fix it.
... and you know what? I'm "addicted" to WoW. I spend, even in school, many hours per week playing it. And you know what? I still find time for my lovely girlfriend, studying, and going out.
Telling other people to stop their friends from playing, and telling parents to stop their children playing is wrong. That's akin to the christian crusaders out there insisting that anyone who has sex, does drugs, or has any "fun" in life is going straight to hell.
What is required is a sense of perspective. An ability to step back and say, "gee, this is a HELL of a lot of fun, but I have 'X' due tommorrow, so I better get on it."
Now most mature, intelligent and disciplined people can do this rationally. I can. Yes, it's difficult. But how is that any different than it being difficult to not play with one's children? Or not take in the symphony every night?
Now I'm not equating a GAME with one's children in terms of importance. But the "addiction" is the same. If it's something in your life, and you derive great pleasure from it, why deny it to yourself when you can simply prioritize the "important" things instead? Priortize your family's needs. Prioritze work/school. But if you have free time, do what you want with it. Use your willpower - you do have it, it's just a case of wanting to exercise it.
For those of you that "can't" - seek professional help. I mean that sincerely.
Remember what people said about games after the columbine shooting? "It was not bad parenting! It was violence in video games!" Same thing. Still flawed.
The thing is, you can try and stop em early, but if they wanna have fun, they will just leave at 18, get a decent job, then just play.
I feel that all you parents are experiencing a child who just has taken it too far.
Look at it this way, what would you rather?
your kid doing drugs and alcohol or playing a game??
We all know what those things do to you, they get you killed, playing a game is just a source of fun!
I really don't think playing a game will ruin your life, mine is fine, and i play the game.
but what can you do.
I'm sorry for all the parents who have gone through depression from this game, remember, its only a game!! not real life. if your child cannot distinguish between priorites and needs, then they just will have to learn.
This isnt a lecture, i'm not tellin you what you have to do... but im just sharing my opinion.
I will stop playing, I will play less. But week after week I find myself playing the same amount of time. Today Oct-17-2005 I am glad to say I got up the corage to delete the game. I know alot of you readers are prob laughing at us. "Courage hahah why would it take courage to delete a game." But trust me I found out today the video game addiction is worst then most other addcitions out there. I mean atleast theres help if you are addcited to Drugs. But if you are a video game addict you feel ashamed about yourself even more so then a drug addcit. Society does not see video game addiction as a major problem, but I am living proof that it is. I am really ashamed to say this but if it helps atleast one kid who has the same problems as I do then here it goes.
Like The main poster I come from a very good family. I was never abused by my father or ignored by my mother. They both worked really hard to get where they are today. I mean sure they hit me when I was a child but lets be honest most chidlren deserved a good spanking once in a while. My sister is amazing. She always bested me at everything we did. She is my garudian angel that watches over me. ( Ofcourse I would never tell her this) My parents started with nothing we lived in a small house back when I was a little kid. Every few years we would move from house to house. Frist we lived in a 1 room apartment , then a 4 room house, then a 7 room and now we live very comfortably in a 6 room house with a outdoor pool.
Im not saying this to impress anyone im basically trying to state the fact that I was loved and well taken care of. However, the love of my family did not wonder out into my social life. Throughout my life I had little friends. I could never figure out why. Every school I goto everyone I meet ends up making fun of me or outcasting me all together.
Perhaps this is one reason that lead to my video game addcition.
Every year from middle to highschool my grades were horrible. Many F's and many C's when I would show my parents my report cards my heart would break. And I know that my mothers heart is breaking as well. After middle school I think I learned to tune out the fact that my grades were so bad. And on to highschool is where things really got hard. Like always the frist day of school seemed like a new begining. A time to make new friends a time to shine. However, for some reason my dreams always crush. A few weeks into the school year my so called friends would gang up on me and make fun of me or call me names. I act like its normal but it really does hurt. For those of you who are parents please I beg you if your children are being teased even if they act like its nothing please please please know that its on some level killing them. Words are not just words it affects who we are and who we will become.
I think it was in the middle of my high-school year when I really started getting addcited to computers and the cyber world. It started with me passing by one of those lan cafes. I saw people playing the computer. The game of choice, none other then Counter-Strike. A game where you play as either a Counter-Terrosit or a Terrosist. Your objective is simple to kill the other team. This game was really addictive because you could see yourself getting better. As you progressed into the game you felt a sense of suporiority over other players because you are so much better. This sounds so stupid and immature but thats how I felt and I am sure this is how other hard core gamers feel. After playing a while I got invited into a clan and in this clan I meet many people. We joined a leauge called the cyber athletic leauege or CAL. We held practices 2 - 3 times a week and we organized strategy and game plays like any other sport. It took many hours of my time. I neglected school work and my families constant "nagging." Every year I would tell my mother " I promise you this year is going to be the year, I will excel in my school work and pay more attention." And each year I fail to do so. I could tell she hurt. She thinks I dont care but I really do. I want to be the perfect son and the perfect brother. But to be honest I didn?t know how. All I knew that counterstrike made be belong.
After barely graduating high school I started college. My grades were horrid from highschool so I had to go to a 2 year college. My parents are really big on their children graduation from college. I told them this was it no more immature Eric. Heh, I was kidding myself, the cycle continued. This is about the time World of Warcraft came out. My first semester grades were decent, but then it got worst and worst. My parents spent so much money on tutors but nothing seemed to work. Up until today I spent hours upon
hours on the computer playing world of warcraft. I beleive my playing time was 8 weeks something. That means i spent a total of 8 weeks of my life sitting in front of the computer playing world of warcraft. Every time I told my self I was going to quit, I always found a reason not to. "I spent so much time on my character its such a waste if I just quit." and "I have so much gold why would I quit?" I?ve been battling for weeks with myself going over those questions. Like a drug addict I told myself I was not addicted and that I could stop at anytime. But inside I knew I was addicted, and I was crying for help. I still am crying for help, but I am too ashamed. What have I become...
I wasted so many years of my life playing games and being a complete dick to my parents and my sister. When I was playing world of warcraft I didn?t have fun at all , and doing guild raids seemed like such a chore but still I did it. I can?t explain why. I still have a problem, I am addicted to video games. For some reason today for no apparent reason I just thought enough was enough. I went to programs world of warcraft then uninstall. Then I went to world of warcraft and unsubscribe. Heh, its 4 am in the morning and I cant sleep. I have a strong feeling it is because I just deleted something im addicted to and im going through sort of a detox phase. I decided to put more time into my school work and more effort into my social life. I couldn?t sleep so I decided to go online to read up on video gaming addiction. And when I read this story I felt like I had to post my story as well. Sorry If my writing is harsh and unreadable but I didn?t pay much attention in school and I suppose I am paying for it now. Thank you guys for giving me closure I think that is what this post did for me. Thanks for giving me a place to say what I had to say and not feel ashamed for doing so. I think some day I will find the courage to get the real help I need, but baby steps I guess.
Here?s some words of Advice from a "Hard Core Gamer" to parents, this is straight from the source so trust me on this I am right. I may not be a psychologist but I really do know what I am talking about in this subject matter. IF your kid is playing world of warcraft or any game that requires a subscription fee I beg you cancel it.
Yes I know that some of you might think my child is different or my child might get angry canceled his game for no reason. But some part of him, I swear on this, wants you to do it. He might yell scream and kick but it?s the best thing you can ever do for him. World of Warcraft is to time consuming and if you ask any player they can tell you the addiction only gets worst. If you child has to door closed all the time please ask him to leave it open. When you walk into his room and his computer is on but his monitor is off, turn it on and see what he is doing. You may think this is an invasion of privacy but as a 22 year old kid im telling you I wish to god someone did that for me. Don?t get me wrong my parents are not bad parents, they tell me I spend to much time on the computer and they have asked me to leave the door open. I just stupidly ignored them. And I played the turn off monitor trick with them when they ask me to open the door. If your child does have world of warcraft you can find out how much "online time" (the total amount of hours he spent on one character) by typing /playtime while he is online. This may sound like total ramble but I really am just trying to help. If I can help one person out there then I am happy. I thank you for your time. And I thank you for this closure.
First off, I would like to introduce myself.
My name is Jack, and I am 20 years old. I am in my second year of university working towards my master. Ever since I was 5 years old (even younger), I have been a gamer. I am a member if the "First Generation Gamer" as gaming was still quite new when I was born. I have a core group of friends which I have had for many years, and the foundation is solid.
Time for some definitions:
ad·dict
tr.v. ad·dict·ed, ad·dict·ing, ad·dicts
1) To cause to become physiologically or psychologically dependent on a habit-forming substance: The thief was addicted to cocaine.
2)To occupy (oneself) with or involve (oneself) in something habitually or compulsively: The child was addicted to video games.
Now there are those of you out there who go on to say "well I play video games, and I can quit anytime". I'm sure that is true, but you have to take other aspects into consideration. For example, when I was young, ALOT of my time was put into video games because there was ALOT of spare time. My parents couldn't afford to put me into any sports/activities etc but my friends COULD. This gave me alot of time alone (as my parents worked 14 hours/day 6-7 days a week). With this spare time I played video games, and with good cause, as it was cheap and very entertaining (also kept me out of trouble).
As time went on, homework from school increased, but not to the point where I had no time to play video games. Now I had to balance video games with my education (obviously). What happened, was as I got further and further into the education system, I was given less and less spare time to play video games. Because I was such an avid gamer for the past half a decade, I was now at a point where playing games was part of my identity.
It was this "identity" which was my downfall. When I reached grade 12 my "addiction" was in full swing. I would play as many video games as I was accustomed too, and because of that, I would slack off on my school work to be able to hit my daily "gaming quota".
Now you can sit back in your chair and laugh at me, but this is a SERIOUS issue now. I DO NOT know how to study anymore, and my vocabulary is slipping each passing day (omg wh4t a 1337 d00d). Is this an issue with myself? Is this a problem with how I was raised? Is this a problem with video games? After 15 years of gaming, I have come to the conclusion that it is all three of those issues working together, to basically damn my soul.
Just like the homeless man who sleeps in the street now because his house was destroyed in a fire, and his family was killed; or the woman who was raped as she was walking her dog in the park, got pregnant, and decided not to have kill her unborn bastard child; I have had something done to me which I have little control over. It has affected my life in the most terrible way, but there is enough of me left to make notice of the issue, and act on it before it is too late (being kicked out of university for example).
How can you be so cruel and MOCK me... mock Wes? Would you go up to an alchoholic and "HAHAAHAHAH" in his face? We have to fight the silent war, the war where nobody is able to help us... We are alone in this war, and I lose a little more faith in humanity every time I see those in need, being MADE FUN OF!... Terrible.
Ranting aside, you have to understand that an addiciton is an addiction is an addiction etc...
It's where something becomes so much of your life, it destroys other aspects quickly (drugs) or slowly (gaming). Those of you who grew up in a rich learning enviroment, had parents who were very involved in your life; I envy you. I did not PLAN on failing many of my first year university classes because I was to busy feeding my addiction, playing World of Warcraft. I did not PLAN on being a loner who has never had an intimate relationship with a girl (and probably won't for a few more years). I did not PLAN to have these bad things happen to me. I have been conditioned to live like this, I have never lived any other way... Immagine how hard it is to change your life completely.
Wes and I have alot in common, however the one difference is I failed where he has succeded. I at one time deleted all computer games from my computer in a vain attempt to fix the problem. It took only 48 hours until those games were back on my hard drive. I sometimes wish someone would come up to my room, take my computer games and throw them into a garbage can, and burn them. I can see how my life could be improved by completely removing video games from my life, but as I've said before, they are part of my identity. I AM a gamer, short and simple, but it's how I was raised.
"but Jack, it's not the video games fault you suck at life, it's your own fault, get over it you pathetic fool". In some ways I feel the same way, but to be honest, it would be foolish to not place any responsibility on the video gaming industry. They make games which are designed to pull you in, so you will buy them. In the end, money is all that matters. MMORPG's like WoW are designed to keep you playing, so that you (and millions of other subscribers) will pay the 15-18 dollar/month fee. They may claim to create a game for the sole purpose of being "fun to play", but "fun" doesn't pay their BMW.
To end off my rant, I would like to warn those parent who might just "cut-off" their kids from video games/television/movies to save them from a fate similar to myself. DON'T! I knew a few kids like that back in highschool, and they were social outcasts because they were SO out of touch with the world around them. They had nothing to relate them to their peers, and as such were branded "losers". As a gamer, my addiction was invisible, and nobody was able to make fun of me for it. What you need to do to ensure your child is well balanced, is to regulate his/her activities. If my parents were able to show me at a young age how many "fun" activities there realy were, I find it QUITE unlikely I would have as much interest in gaming as I do now.
I hope you can understand the hell in which I live, and can only hope that we live together in a world which does not judge/make fun of those who have no way to defend themselves using the current standards of society (I sure hope that made you feel big).
I'm going to make a final attempt to sever myself from my addiction tonight (which is why I was googling "WoW addicitons"). If I fail, it is almost certain I will be kicked out of university for three years due to poor marks. Also understand that if I win this battle, nobody will ever know of the toils I have had to endure. nobody will ever understand the stress it has caused me. There will be NO external reward other than the salvation of my REAL LIFE! And it is this which is the greatest challenge of my life.
Wish me luck, Don't knock me down. I only hope I can be as strong as Wes.
-The addict
I've spent way too much time in virtual worlds but it has fueled my passion for technology like nothing else could.
These worlds are the infant state of virtual reality, the reason those who indulge too much look stupid is because of primitive state of human interfaces with technology (like cave paintings, early cars and punch cards).
I know quite a few people who are quite social whose lives i certainly do not envy. The grass is always greener...
Play your games and don't feel guilty unless you let it rule you, but apply the same rule to every part of your life or you will find yourself in the same sinking boat again.
I am Timo from the netherlands, i bought world of warcraft the day that it was released, march 2005 (EU release). My hobby is definetly computer games, i played comptuer games since i was around 5 years old. Back then i didnt play much, but this increased due to discrimination (i am foreign). My parents didnt want to buy a computer, so i played at the babby sitter were i used to go 5 days a week.
In 2003 i sold absolutly everything i had, and i bought myself a high tech computer. I play a lot now, and i love it. On a working day i use the computer around 5-6 hours, in a saturday or sunday i use it around 11 hours. I say use cause i use the computer for gaming and some other interest like websites. Overal i spend 75% the above given numbers on gaming.
This is okay, i make free time for other activities. Like partying, socializing and working.
But then i bought World of Warcraft, it was released the day before a vacation. I acctualy didnt went to school that day. I was the first to bought it, right after the store opened. I installed it but it didnt work. Blizzard ****** up, after a year of beta testing and the release in the US they still managed to overlook there server capicitie. So i waited, checking the news, trying to register etc. I waited till 6:00 AM the next morning, thats when it started working again. A new problem raised, the box said it had a free month. They didnt say you needed a valid Credit Card to activate. Here in Europe Credit Cards are not comman payment options. I knew no one of my familie would give me there number so i could activate and pay Blizzard thruw a relative. I exactly knew what to do, insert a false Credit card Number, which i found on the internet. With this i activated.
That vacation i wasted completly. I woke up around 13:00,i ate my breakfast and then played untll dinner, 17:00, after that i took a shower and played until 4:00 AM. Day in Day out, and it was honestly the best time of my life (18 years old).
When i bought the game i made a promis with myself, i said: Timo, you play 90 days and no more.. The argument was that it cost 29 euros for 60 days, count the game with this and you got 100 euro. A normal new game cost around 65 euros. I dont like paying to much, so i didnt want to spend more than 100 euro total.
I fact i played 210 days.
I quit playing cause i saw how sick it was. I didnt care about my familie, school, job, business, girlfriends or anything else. World of Warcraft, the game i have been waiting for all my life. I considered around 2 weeks, and then i gave it up and deleted it... I even cried a little after that.
The fact is i am still adicted, it has been around 3 months since i last played. I still often search for pictures of the game, or listen to the World of Warcraft music. I want to play it again, but no, but yes... It has a hold on me, every day.
I dont know why its so adicted, i know its beauty (it realy is in the eyes of a real gamer).
I do know why it taked all your time.
You cant play for 1 hour, you hardly even started after 1 hour. A normal quest takes about an hour or two (depends), an dungeon can take up to 6 hours, NON STOP. Dungeons are the place to be for the best items and the best experience. They are most fun and chalending. They demand you form a team of 5 members. When you start a dungeon you have to finish it, you cant save it. You cant leave cause then you have to do it all over again and leave your teammates.
But it goes much further, you got to level your caracter (make him stronger) give him 2 job/proffesions. In fact you need to do everything what you need to do in real life.
So imagine that you started this, and its absolutly great... YOu just get sucked in, it replaces your life.
Now it is said that you can take the road between. Play only saturday or only during vacation. However if you do this, you wont be the same level as your 'friends', you will get levels behind, coming into an other world of warcraft generation. You have to keep up.
It's your seconde life, you have to maintain it.
I mis the game a lot, which is absolutly sick. I do go out and occasionaly have a date and/or girldfriend. I do have friends. But this all is in one of my life's.
This is the bitter truth, i am not the only one. I would like to get cured, if not i will play agian one day. Considering there will be a expansion coming out soon.
I love reading your posts, keep them up! maby ill find my cure among you.
ps: sorry me for my grammar, English is my seconde language.
However, I do know that several of my friends play World of Warcraft as much as I do; which can be as many as twelve to eighteen hours daily, any and all times of day.
"Warcrack," as it is sometimes called, gives me meaning. It gives me instant friendships, glory, discovery, excitement, and danger.
That instantaneousness quickly dissolves, leaving an empty hole. The solutions? You can seek more time-consuming methods of real fulfillment or move on to better items, bigger guilds, more money, stronger skills. However, the more steeped you get in the game, the harder it is to revive the social life, the school grades, the artistic talents, the real-life skills.
Loving Friends, Family, etc.; You are possibly the only ones who can confront the one you care about. Remind them constantly, because their 'friends' in the World of Warcraft try their best to encircle themselves with people similarly sucked in. Discuss it while they're playing. Be a fool for a moment, feel disrespected just a little while, to save a person who sits at a screen being a fool for hours on end.
Our eyes are on the screen, but if you love us, we will listen.
--WoW gamer, battling with addiction--
Anyway, now that I am back in the US, specifically NYC, I installed this game.
I must admit, it's a lot of fun....fun, addicting, hardly. Wanna talk addicitons? HA! Well, being in entertainment public relations and such, I am/was used to going to a lot of events, parties etc Trust me, there are a lot of OTHER things out there that are actually addictive (I don't need to elaborate).
Now, being 26, I?m pretty much over frying my brain let alone letting something silly control my life.
I was taught the lesson, ?everything you say or do has a direct consequence on your well being.? I OWN my apartment, a dog, got a fantastic job, and could not imagine throwing it away for some silly game (or anything else for the matter!?)
Yes I played this past weekend for like 4 hours, big deal, it was Sunday afternoon and I wanted to. Do I want to play again, sure? I also want a large extra cheese pizza almost daily, (sounds good right now)does this mean I am addicted to food now? Will I order it, no, I quite like having a nice body.
My point being, if it wasn't good or fun (or delicious), people wouldn't want to do it again, that doesn't constitute an addiction.
Get a life, it's a game. If you don't have the back bone to set rules for yourself, then you're obviously not a mature adult, seek therapy, it?s generally covered under insurance. For the parents out there, shame on you. My parents had me involved in every activity imaginable when I was young (acting, swimming, soccer, youth group, music, modeling, gardening, language lessons, etc). or they would give me their own homework (ex. collect the following items outdoors and write a report on each). Parents who lose control of their kids are lame and should be punished by law, or should be voluntarily committed into a rehab program where they learn to be mature parents. You ?lay? you pay people, so you shoot out a youngster into this world expect, at the very least, to be a good example, not some sorry excuse, whining on a CNET forum.
So no, WOW is not addictive. End Discussion.
I first got into games when I was young, about 10 years old or younger. I wasn't really addicted until I started playing RPG's (role-playing games) like Diablo. If I were to list the most addicting/damaging games in my experience:
Diablo 2, Counterstrike, Warcraft 3, Civilization, Starcraft.
I was seriously addicted throughout high school for months at a time, where'd I'd be tired, have no social motivation, and wake up late and skip classes. I started out with a 3.8 GPA freshman year and then it all went downhill. Luckily I am bright and pulled off a 3.3 cumulative, but I was a gaming addict. No girlfriend or socials in high school for me, I just ignored my reality and made my own. I'm starting to understand how computer games can be harmful.
Diablo 2: Getting experience and leveling up and getting better items and skills to get the best character. It's all about hierarchy and a feeling of accomplishment.
Warcraft 3: Being accepted into clans and gaining levels for your account so you could be highest in the overall rankings.
Counterstrike: Getting into clan recruitments was a sense of accopmlishment and also having the most kills to deaths ratio was the goal.
Civilization: Your empire is built and has to dominate the other empires. Taking over a civiilzation was a feeling of power.
Starcraft: This also had clan tags and was an army pitted against an army. You had a record so wins/losses was important in this game.
Throughout these games I had a lot of feelings of accomplishment, even though they were all fake, that was my reality. I played games to be the best. I played more to learn how to be the best. Yes, the feeling of power and status is euphoric, but at the same time I know I'm killing myself. My family doesn't know how to help me, my schoolwork is late.
I only cured computer gaming once. For a period of three months I had a full-feeling of self-control. I started a work-out routine and wrote down my goals on paper and wrote down things that would distract me from my goals, computer games being one of them. During that time, I buffed up and had two really hot blondes attracted to me. I wasn't very experienced thanx to computer games so I didn't really get anywhere with them, but it was the best accomplishment of my life with girls and with my body.
It's an escape from reality. It's a sense of power, but it's hollow. I'm going to write my goals down again and I will never play games again to alter my emotions.
EVER
- My son got hooked on warcraft
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by hankdad
December 5, 2005 6:41 PM PST
- My son of 15 was a 3.5 gpa student, popular, involved in outside activities and World of Warcraft ruined his life. I hope we can get him back. He got the game with some money that he got for his birthday and he really liked the game a lot. He played it at every opportunity, and I must admit that seeing the game I thought it looked pretty neat. After a couple of months went by, we figured that he would get bored with it, but it never happened. Instead we found him sleeping at the computer one morning after playing all night. His grades suffered terribly. He would sneak to the computer while we were sleeping and play . He also skipped school to play and by sheer luck we caught him doing this on more than one occasion. His current aspirations are to quit school (He is currently failing several classes) as soon as possible, get whatever job he can and play warcraft. What a waste of a life that would be. He is rude to everyone. He resented us restricting the time that he was allowed to play. He doesn't care about school, or his future, or a social life, or contributing to society. Today we cancelled his account. PARENTS: DO NOT LET YOUR KIDS NEAR THIS GAME!
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